i see i have had to allow a few days to pass before i could begin to write about the gamelon performance and initiation ceremony at the temple last week...i think it was so intense that i needed to get some distance from it...
so now, back to a simple quiet rhythm again, without rehearsals every night...and feeling the "lack" it is possible to begin to put it into words..
we were invited to be there at 3 to pray and at 4 to play, and then go home...when we (2 guests here at the resort that i invited) arrived...we found "workmen" (villagers/musicians) on the pavillion with strips of palm leaf that they were cutting with little razors or cutting knives into intricate designs thru many layers...and then hanging them from the ceiling as decorations, like crepe paper in the western world...so balinese time is flexible...
slowly women from the gamelon orchestra began to arrive, each one with an offering that she was carrying on her head, either in colorful straw baskets or on trays; fruits, rice, cakes, incense, flowers....and they placed them near the pavillion...and later inside the inner courtyard of the temple where the altars are....
we were busy taking photos, and they agreed to pose and were full of giggles and joy. always...they all joined in in finishing the decorations and then we were invited to perform...the "guests" were the other villagers, who had also slowly strolled in with their offerings, and casually sat on the edge of the "stage" or on the steps of the temple, kids running around dressed in their holiday clothes, men with white shirts and yellow satin material wrapped around their waists, and a white band on their foreheads...the celebration was the full moon.
when i asked my spiritual advisor dewah why we celebrating the full moon, he said: there are those that say that when there is a full bright light in the sky it is easier to connect thru it to god. there is a lot of light making an open path to communicate. there is also the dark moon celebration ." I "corrected him" and said New Moon....and he continued " when it is dark in the sky, it also allows a special communication with god, since there are no other lights grabbing our attention in all different directions, others may tell you other explanations..this is the one i know." i liked his!
all 18 women sat down in their white blouses at the musical instruments and we began to play the 5 songs we had been practicing (they for 3 months, me for 4 days)....it was all very casual, mistakes were made, giggles and talking and all very nonchalant, people getting up and walking around and coming and going, kids running around, and us, playing ... when we finished the leader said lets do it again...so we did...this time a little better....meanwhile everyone had wandered into the inner temple courtyard and were sitting on mats on the ground...the men on a raised platform on the side, women and children on the ground. when we all entered one by one through the narrow entrance way, the priest shooed us out and said that first we need to purify our bodies since we are now in the gamelon temple womens orchestra...so we all filed out and went to the entrance of the temple where the priest sat on a mat on the ground with all the symbolic waters and flowers, and things...2 priestesses were assisting in getting it all organized....again very casual, one saying one thing, the other saying that it should be different...all easy going, laughter, and as if inventing it all anew each time...(probably like in the synagogue in yodfat ...)
and as we stood in a semi circle 2 rows deep, there was non stop laughter chatting, cell phones ringing, looking at photos of the cell phone, handing cameras to people to photograph us, and it left me a little confused....here we were, going through a special purification of the body ceremony and it didn't seem in the least bit special or demanding of any attention...giggle giggle, push, laugh, talk, all happy and easy, including the conductor/teacher...the priest and priestesses meanwhile were making their rounds doing the actions and blessings on each one of us....i was trying to be attentive and focused, but thought that maybe that is not the intention, even though it was what i felt inside of me...i kept looking around for at least one other person that chose to be silent and attentive....but it was only me and the gardener/musician so at least i knew it was an option if he too was doing it...there was something very nice about the easygoingness of it all...and most of the women were in their 30's and 40's...so only me and another one were grannies...
after the 45 minute ceremony we entered the temple grounds, sat down on the mats, and again lots of prayers and water and rice and incense and chants, and all the women, chatting giggling, leaning on each other, cell phones...and then there were 5 men that spoke one after the other...standing up with a microphone and speaking in a very sincere, quiet, attentive manner, each one for quite a long time, looking out at the 8 rows of women and children and speaking....again, i was the lone one that was listening, even though it was all in balinese...i watched them and "heard" a running commentary in my head of exactly what they were saying but in kabbalah terms....i have no explanation for this, i just know this is what happened for the entire hour....i knew they were saying important things and that i now am familiar with those things, and that it is all one, and thank god i have been exposed to this wisdom...
the gardener/musician was the last to speak, and i wished i could have really understood what he was saying , because he was speaking about the power of the gamelon music and the transformation that playing the music does to the person playing ....(asked my girlfriend what he spoke about and that is what she said and also what i felt...)
what was interesting for me was that not one of the men that spoke (mayor, former mayor, village leaders....) seemed at all annoyed or concerned that no one was listening attentively...they continued in their sincere quiet manner (without reading any notes) to speak, and everyone else was quietly speaking too the entire time....it was very admirable...as if they know that this is the level of the people at the present time, and not to demand any more than they can give...just like not expecting a child to stand perfectly still if he is in kindergarten...by first grade you can already start encouraging and teaching him how to stand quietly, but before that, it is understood that it is still too early, and together with that, maybe something is sinking in in any case...
afterwards everyone went out, and we played all the songs again one more time, i think as "purified gamelon players" this time! and then had a little meal together on a mat spread out...and out of a big plastic box the women handed out "carry out" balinese food: a little shallow bowl made from banana leaves weaved together, containing a few spoonfuls of rice and some spicy pieces of chicken which one eats with their fingers. i love seeing these natural solutions to picnics, instead of paper plates and plastic silverware and all the bags of garbage afterwards...here, there was no garbage...i all just recycles itself!
and when my driver took me home he told me that now there will be 2 weeks vacation from rehersals....oh....i was so sad....how could they?! (they were after 3 intensive months, me just 4 days and hungry for more of the 3 hour nightly playing) and as i walked to the room, sad and disappointed that after all that, the remaining time i have here in bali will not be during full moons, and i will only be at one rehearsal before i leave for the hoop retreat in march, since i am supposed to be back in israel for february.... and a few hours later i received an email saying that the planned bat nitzvah that i was returning to israel for, was postponed until april....at first i was angry, about the wasted money on a ticket and everything...and by the following morning, when i woke up i realized that i received exactly what i wanted...to be here for more gamelon orchestra temple music playing! what a shock that was to see how instead of seeing the positive hidden side of it, there i was concentrating on being a victim...
it has been a slow process over the past couple of days of accepting reality and being grateful and letting go of what was supposed to be, and remembering that everything is perfect exactly how it is at this very moment,
the women that came to the temple with me photographed the performance...and it was very interesting hearing and seeing it the following day on the laptop....it had absolutely no similarity to the magnificence and power and music that i heard and felt as we played....a pale shadow of reality....but a nice memento...
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