even though i feel quite young, and people tell me i look young for my age, and my hair is still brown with some grey, and i am physically active, i guess i still look like i am a grandma. and it seems that that is a very attractive place to be...people like gramas here, and call them "mama". so today i was officially initiated into my landlords family as their "mama". they want me to feel at home, join them in their meals, and be part of the compound. they only have one child, luckily a male, who is 25 and a doctor living in in a major city 3 hours away. so i feel like a kid living with them, and they feel like they just gained a grandma, since their own parents have passed away, or as the balinese always pantomime to me "are asleep".
the husband is a geography teacher at the junior high school and wears various colored uniforms to work 6 days a week. he has a great smile, and is usually smiling, speaks fluent english, and when he comes home at mid-day from work, the first thing he does is take off his government uniform and put on a sarong and walks around bare chested. he likes to wake up early and take his vespa to the sea a few minutes away, and watch the sunrise or walk along the beach at sunset. he owns 4 vans which he rents out and is also a part time driver in the afternoons for tourists. he is 54 and an energetic good man.
the wife is 48 and was a seamstress and later a beautician before she married and had a child and then opened up a little shop in front of the house. the little shop has turned into a bigger one and she is the one that goes to the major city an hour away and buys large quantities of the soaps and dry goods to sell to all of the small shops in the area. she enjoys her work because she can just roll down the big aluminum front to her shop and have a rest if she wants. a few years ago she took her savings from her earnings (what women earn is their own) and decided to build 2 duplexes on a piece of land they had by the sea. so she planned and designed over the years the units and rents them out to tourists. she has a maid that cleans them, and cooks and helps in her shop too...by our standards you might call her a "slave" since the young girl works 7 days a week, from 7 in the morning until 9 at night, with a short afternoon siesta, and does whatever needs to be done, and probably for about $2 a day.but they have a very nice relationship and both seem grateful to have each other. she speaks english too, is very friendly and generous, as is the wife. she too is married, has a 5 year old son that her mother-in-law raises, since they live by her in-laws, as every son usually does once he marries.
it is interesting living with them. by balinese standards they are quite wealthy. together with that, they are very simple, friendly, generous, kind people. it doesn't seem to matter to her whether i rent the room in her house for $2.50 a night, or the duplex for $30. she just wants me to be happy. she is glad to have someone to practice improving her english with, and that is her "mama" and i am happy to be part of their family, discovering the simple kind way that they live. when i shared this with another balinese friend i have that is not wealthy and has taken their life savings of $3,000 to build their first home. (yes, you can build a house here for a little more than that, from start to finish in about 3 months) she told me that this is how about half of the balinese people are....they live with whatever they have, and are not busy trying to make more and more money, but rather "are rich" from their relationships with people. they believe that if they are kind and have good relationships, they will always have enough money for their needs, and friends to help them in time of need.
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