"be careful"

the first day i was in Bali, in 2010, a local woman befriended me (in order to get some $ fruit from me....since as a foreigner i was a $ tree to her) and when we parted and i started to walk back on the beach to my bungalow she said "be careful". i was surprised...what do i have to be careful of? it was not part of my lexicon in life until then, but gave it a moment of attention and then went on my way. what followed was that as i walked on the beach i suddenly noticed pieces of glass and sharp metal, and was grateful for the warning, which brought my attention to the possible danger and the need for being careful.

another time the chef was just about to cut up a huge tuna in a little sink, and i just had to get a photo of it, so i asked her to wait a minute while i run bring my camera. as i ran to my room she called out to me "be careful". what am i supposed to be careful of while getting my camera?! and when i returned with it i asked her why she said that to me. "if you do things slowly there is more attention paid and less chance for accidents to happen. no need to run. you can always walk and be careful, i wait for you." hmm...interesting...i was so used to rushing, hurrying, doing things quickly, because the next thing needs to be done and the clock is ticking...and suddenly i had an insight as to why the balinese work slowly but efficiently and rhythmically.

yesterday i was leading my girlfriend and her 3 children through the forest to my room. even though it was their territory, they did not know about this little path so i was the "leader". i walked confidently in front of them as they made a bee line behind me. having experienced the disadvantages of wearing my usual long swaying skirts that get caught on branches, among other things, i had taken to wearing sarongs which are much more compact and close to my legs and body with less chance of being torn or caught on something. the first few days of wearing the sarong were not as simple as i thought. suddenly the steps i could take were much smaller, the pace i could walk was much slower, my stride was being "contained"...hmm...do i like this? am i losing my freedom?

each time i would wrap the sarong around me i would try and figure out how those young balinese girls did a kind of knee spread as they wrapped their sarongs around them at the dance class, and i never understood why...but since it had struck my attention i decided to try and mimic it, and soon discovered how it gives breadth to the width but keeps the waist svelt! okay! got it! and that allowed a bit more leeway.

and then there were the "steps"....going up and down them with a tight sarong on....and how they would kind of walk down the steps sideways instead of just walking down them facing forward....why? and as i continued to lead the way, we reached one of three little presently dried up waterways which demanded to take a step down and across the little ditch. while i was holding three hoola hoops on my shoulder, and trying to keep up a good pace so that we would reach my room in time for our massages that were starting soon, i "automatically" began to take a wide step across the ditch to reach the other side, (and not do a kind of half turn and go down into the ditch and up the step as they would do). the next moment i found myself crawling out of the ditch with a bruised elbow, to the excited balinese that seemed to be in shock at seeing me fall. i assured them that i am fine. it took a few minutes to reassure the children that all is well and not to worry. as i wondered why all the excitement, i thought this may well have been the first time they ever saw an adult fall. even though they have 10 men working on their tall new home in the garden, on narrow wooden scaffolding, nothing drops or is thrown down, and no one misses a step. they are all barefoot and balancing themselves while they use a handsaw, or hammer, or pass huge wooden beams to each other, without any hard hats or reinforced working boots. all down slowly and delicately like a beautiful ballet,

as i gathered myself and the hoops up and we continued on our way, i tried to figure out how that just happened, and realized that my body has a natural wisdom of how wide a step i can physically take, and it still hadn't internalized new "sarong" standards! i knew i could easily cross that ditch, but my tight sarong couldn't! and as i spread my foot in the air to get over to the other side, i was unprepared for the sudden restraint i would experience, of the material binding me to smaller steps, which left me in mid air falling into the ditch.

before i said anything about my realization, putu explained to me that "when we wear sarongs, it means that you walk slower and more focused. you slow your pace down. that is why the young people do not wear sarongs these days....they have so much energy and no patience for it. only the older people wear them nowadays. please be careful."

when i met her 15 year old daughter today, as she was walking home from school on the narrow road, along with the other 700 children from the junior high school, she said hello in passing, and added "be careful." i smiled and reassured her i would. she is telling ME to be careful! what about those 700 children casually walking in threes and fours along this busy road, without a sidewalk, while traffic zooms by? and at the same time remembered how the word for "be careful" is "heart-heart"...pay attention with your heart, be in your heart, be guided by your heart, heart consciousness. so the sarong, along with other simple traditional elements of this culture is forcing me to slow down, pay attention, and be careful. the balinese are very aware of the delicate balance of "forces" at work in the world. they believe that if someone falls, or gets hurt, it was because of the little "trickster-demons" that are always there, teasing us if they see we are not "being careful"...and then they get to sneak up and "wake us up" to return to our hearts.