a new start

The computer had a virus, maybe from the man that sent out a fake e-mail to everyone saying I needed money, and when I stopped his chance…he sent me a virus….but who knows how or why, all I know is that the computer slowly died the day after I managed to notify everyone that I was well…

It was interesting. When I tried for a few hours to get it to work, unsuccessfully, I turned it over to god, since god also created the virus and the man that hoaxed everybody, and I wondered what it is all about. And I made a vow to god that I would like to be able to continue to use my laptop for purposes that will bring me closer to doing gods will; which means studying kabbalah, translating kabbalah, staying in touch with family and friends, and with working my program, and hopefully bringing good things into the world; whether through my blog or through my photographs…and that that would be the only use I would make with the laptop….only to bring me closer to doing gods will.

So now I have had an overhaul on the computer, everything that was on it is gone….no past, only the present, and it is very interesting…as usual, when asked by the technician if it is okay to delete “files” I just wave my hand in the air and say yes, do anything you have to do to make it work again. And I don’t even think about it a moment longer…and only after it is all gone, do I start to realize the repercussions…no more photos, no more music, no more past….only present….

The feeling is good, even though there were a few moments each time when I realized that something else was gone forever, and I said to ketut “all my music is gone?” “yes” “all?” “yes” “wow, I should have told him to put it on the stick first!” and he said that the computer was not responding at all so it wasn’t even an option…and that maybe I wanted music but I would have “zero” computer so the music isn’t worth anything.

It made me laugh each time how ketut related to the computer as a human being; now it is napping, now it is thinking, now it is not telling us what the problem is, it does not know how to speak….” And one of the payoffs of this all is learning patience…just seeing their long delicate fingers touching the keys ever so lightly, and then waiting, no hurry, no cursing, just waiting….

And it was also fun paying the lovely man that repaired it for over 2 hours, and took $20…and when I thanked him profusely for fixing it, he said “it is because you came to Bagus computer shop! Bagus is the best!” .It is nice to see that he is proud of his store and his work.

When I was browsing through a magazine the other day there was an article about decluttering inside and outside…and I thought : ah yes…that would be nice! And so now I have an empty computer….and hopefully it will serve me well and I will treat it well, respectfully and not abuse it with demanding it to work faster and multi task or with multiple copies of things, and just icons and things left on it that no longer are needed…just like having clean space, a clean house a clean computer…and jochan is supposed to physically clean it for me…it had some ink on a corner of it and I asked him if he knows how to remove it. And he looked at the computer and said: I never want to see it look like this again! I couldn’t see anything wrong with it,, so I asked him what he means, and he said it is so filthy that it repulses him ….i laughed…happy that he can see the dirt and is willing to clean it for me and that I don’t see the dirt and love my computer just the way it is, but why not have it nice and clean too?!